This post was written on Sunday, June 9th, 2013.

I'm in West Virginia. I've been here since Wednesday the 29th. I don't want to leave tomorrow, but I have to.
Zoe and I came down for Megan and Matt's wedding, which was yesterday. We've been talking about, planning, and looking forward to this trip for months. In the last couple days before we left, my anticipation skyrocketed- but despite how much I wanted to be here with my three best friends (Megan, Katie and Zoe), I was content to let departure day take its time in arriving.
You see, this trip is the kick-off. This trip is the beginning of it all. I've known for months that once this trip arrived, I would blink and be at college. 
Here to CYIA to here again to missions trip to Lydia's wedding to college, with as much of the in-between time as possible spent at work.

Back to the present- I can hardly believe that Megan is married. She is Mrs. Dean now, and though she is the same person, the part of her that played house with her until we were well beyond the normal house-playing age and did ridiculous things like trying to drench the hill that was her back yard in water so we could go sledding in 90-degree weather and came crying to me whenever she was hurt is gone. It wasn't yesterday that Matt became the person who was the most intimate with and dear to Meg, and the actual marriage ceremony changed nothing in the order of things- everything has been this way, except names and addresses, for a while now. Still, it made me realize what has happened over these past two years. I feel a bit like Anne of Green Gables talking with the engaged Diana Barry- a little inexperienced, a little left behind. Megan won't be talking to me about what she imagines her life as a newlywed will be like anymore- she'll still listen to me when I voice my imaginations, but she'll be speaking from experience when we talk about this time of life now. We've almost certainly spent more nights laying awake talking in the past 12 years than we will in the entire rest of our lives. We never got to be roommates. She won't be here with Katie when I come to visit anymore.
On the other hand, yesterday was SO full of joy. This marriage has been a long time coming. God has fulfilled a huge number of Megan's desires through Matt. Through His strength and the prayers of those around them, they will have a long and happy marriage. This is a huge, beautiful, wonderful thing.
Such a bittersweet moment in time.

So, in summary, things will be different now. But they will be good.
I can hardly wait for Bible college. I desperately need to be surrounded by people who are like me in principles and goals and are willing to love me, and I pray that I find the community I long for there.

From my journal:

"Imagine anticipating a trip for months, then finally leaving for it. Think of being reunited with your best friends, who you haven't seen in 10 months, at your emotional home, where you haven't been in more time. Can you empathize with someone who's been on a foreign schedule and diet for 2 weeks while doing a LOT of important planning? What if, in the middle of all that, you stopped and visited with your physically failing grandparents as well as people who you haven't seen in almost 3 years? Then, try to comprehend that the girl you've played with, fought with, shared support with and loved since you were 6 years old was married today, leaving you and your sisters 3- an odd, not-right-number of ladies whose dynamic will never be quite the same. Then, know that on the day after tomorrow you will leave a place you feel is home for a place you do not miss."

This weekend has been an emotional wringer. 

I'm going to go enjoy my last night here with Katie and Zoe, though. I'm going to love watching the rain run down the hills, instead of soaking in or standing where it falls. This is the end of an era, and I'm going to be

wistful about it, but before I fall asleep I will look forward to my future and pray to the God who holds my heart in his hands.